MAGIC WORDS

                          .

From a young age through movies, friends and family I learned there are five magical words that are a must for me to learn and put into practice, I learned how to put them into character by the teachings of my parents and these words are;

1.       SORRY.

2.       PLEASE

3.       THANK YOU

4.       PARDON ME

5.       EXCUSE ME

These words have been truly magical for me because, I have come to realize that these words can save you from trouble sometimes if used well.

When you offend a person gravely and sometimes it may seem unforgivable but yet you put on a remorseful attitude and apologise saying “AM SORRY” or even ‘PARDON ME” it goes a long way to ease tension even though some people may still obviate the apology but if you are persistent with your plea and with humility you will get the person to calm down and may even accept the apology.

When someone does you a favour and you say “THANK YOU” it may have an effect on the self esteem of the individual positively. Even when you thank a person for doing what he is supposed to do as a duty it brings a sense of fulfillment and belonging to that person to see him/herself as relevant.

                The word “PLEASE” can get you a lot of things because it is a sincere plea for help, assistance. You must have noticed the behavior of people when you say “Get me that hat” and when you say “Please, could you get me that hat?” Saying this boost the ego of the person you are asking for the favor and may even be motivating. Another example is when you are tired  and a person request from you without saying please and another  ask you with the word PLEASE, you will choose to answer the one with the PLEASE because the word carries a sense of responsibility to the person being requested from.

                The word “EXCUSE ME” is used when you want to take charge, get a person’s attention, ask questions, interrupt a discussion/setting and this word is the only polite way to do this.

                All these 5 words can be used positively and negatively. Positively when it is sincere and negatively when it lacks true emotion and its intent are rude, manipulative and dubious.

Words generally can have double meaning and depend on the emotion being put into it. This tells us that whatever you say and not just the five magical words, you should always portray good emotions and sincerity in it and try not to show non-challance or apathy because words are;

                W-WHAT              or          W-WHAT

                O-OUR                                    O-OUR

                R-REASONING                   R-REASONING

                D-DEPICTS                        D- DEPICTS

                                                                S-SHALLOWLY

I HATE COMPARISONS

                I personally hate people comparing me with another person and can argue that most people will feel this way too. We hate to hear “Can’t you see how Mr. Ade is doing?” “Can’t you see how much your friends are earning?”, but when we are asked what our dreams are we say things like I hope to be richer than Mr. A, own a g-wagon before I am 21 years old, have my masters degree before am 25 years old and if we link up this dream with the source, we realize they emanate from what we noticed from someone and admired.

                Whether we like it or not, we compare in everything we do, when we write an exam and the results are out ,after checking our grades we try look at others grades as some use it as a motivation to work harder. This brings us to the point that comparisons can be constructive or degenerative.

                Degenerative in the sense that sometimes we don’t know our limitations and try to aim for things that may be impossible to get until it becomes our undoing. A typical environmental example of this is someone who studied linguistics in university aiming to work in a petrochemical company as a manager which may be difficult but plans to sleep or bribe his/her way through.

Constructive in the sense that we can use peoples success story and path as a challenge for us to work hard, forge on and carve a niche for ourselves.

                To measure our success or failure, we have to compare the outcome of the plan to the resources spent in achieving the status and we may also need to compare our output which may be a determinant for us to measure our success or failure.

                Comparisons give us a sense of value of a thing or people. When we compare what we have to what others have we will be able to determine whether what we have is valuable in the society or not and makes us strive to be up-to-date with societal change.

                We won’t say because we don’t want to compare we would still insist on using slates instead of using a pen and a book.

In conclusion, comparisons can be constructive or destructive. Constructive if it is used as a driving force for success, to measure success, to become a better person, to make positive influence on the society.

Destructive if it leads one to be covetous, desperate, break laws, become disrespectful and used as a weapon to ruin or dampen another’s mood or spirit.

Lets learn to decide the comparison technique we need to imbibe into our daily lives for a better future.

APPLAUSE

It would be absurd to say “I don’t like being applauded for what I do” because it is a blatant lie.we all seek applause and lime light in our own way even though our religions want us to do things because they are right and not just for the applause of men.

                I agree with this religious concept because from the moment you start seeking the applause of men you start plotting your impending downfall. A well deserved applause is from you yourself. Do lawful things according to societal standard,personal belief or religion with a good conscience and ability to account for  your actions without stuttering and doing things the way you want it to be for you if you were in need of that action you are about to carry out and that way your conscience will be clear and you would be able to applaud yourself and be at peace with yourself.

                Not all applause you get from people are genuine this why you need to trust your decisions and determine if they are right or wrong , so that way you know if you deserve an applause because sometimes out of envy and ill intent people applaud an individual  to the wrong path of destruction while the individual thinks he is on the road to success and he is helping to make the world a better place.

                Getting an applause shouldn’t be our priority, but when we get one , we should carefully weigh the source or action that led to the applause and deeply determine  without being biased if our actions deserved the applause we got and use it as a motivation for our next action.

                We must not get desperate for attention and fame that it affect our decision and reasoning. We should always think out-of-the-box about the possible outcome of our decisions and have back-up plan at hand ready for use.

                Most importantly ,there is a huge difference between getting an applause and a standing ovation . a standing ovation is something that requires hard work of recognition and impact to the society/audience because of  the critic nature of human beings  and we need real convincing of facts,promises and actions that will make us suppress our negative critic of something and rise to applaud  something as excellent.

                So work hard, pray hard, frequently assess your actions ,move with the right people, mind your utterances, be ready to learn from anyone without showing obnoxious attitude, have a good plan mapped out for success and a back-up plan for failure.

BUYING MY HAPPINESS

Even at this moment am still at conflict about the price a person pays for happiness. People would obviously say money can’t buy happiness and some will argue that money contributes to happiness. How do we resolve this inevitable and disturbing question/

                The answer will be dependent on the” source” in which we seek and find our happiness and most especially what we classify as being worth our joy and happiness.

We depend on different things to attain that state of elation, it may be health, wealth, music and other material things but we just fail to realize that getting this requires our toiling and energy to yield results and nothing is for free.

                To maintain health we buy things to feed, prevent illness and keep fit, to make money we use money

                Happiness will happen for us when we get the basic things we need for survival in our grasp.

Should i keep hypnotizing myself to believe that I don’t buy my happiness? Am at a crossroad where picking a path to, happiness is difficult because the paths open are endless and the more we stare at the crossroads the more paths that opens, that brings our mind to a hazy state.

                 Since it has come to the state of being unreal to attain that 100% happiness with no worries at all why don’t we close our eyes for a second, take a deep breath and ignore the conceited crossroads and do whatever we do that will bring us happiness and those around us because the price everyone has to pay for happiness differs and not everyone can afford it and it won’t cost us more to help another get this vital part of our survival’

                The world is now following the “trend system” like a social network application as the efforts and stress we go through changes and differ from individuals,

                Change they say is constant, so the price for happiness changes favoring some people as the cost becomes lesser for some, for some it becomes more expensive and even hard to reach that it causes the heart to ache in agony, sadness and discontent.

                The quest for happiness makes us savage in hunting and winning it as a price. Sometimes, we trample on people we set out together on the journey without even looking back or blinking because ”life must go on”.

                Since this happiness is a must, should we only get it for ourselves? Or consider those who may also want it but can’t afford it and do a good deed to profit them.

                Why don’t we look in ourselves and determine whether we buy our happiness or not, only then is the world going to gradually achieve that elation we desire